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June's Last Day and Final Hours - October 23rd 2008

June 1990 I have always maintained a daily journal or log on the days and times that I spent with June while she was in a nursing home. Below is an identical copy of the journal or log entry that I had made on the last day I spent with June prior to her passing away early the next morning. I have shortened the names of the staff members (first names only) in order to provide some small degree of personal privacy. Complete names used with permission.

Some explanatory and additional notes have been added for clarity in order to tell the story.

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Wednesday Morning - October 22nd

I arrived at 8:50 AM that morning and departed early evening at 6:20 PM. I left briefly in mid morning in order to permit me to send an email to the children about June’s condition. June had Aspiration Pneumonia,a common complication in late stage Alzheimer's. It is caused by food or fluid getting into the lungs.

The day Nurse was Carolyn with Nursing Assistants Zippy and Beth. The evening Nurse was Dianne with Nursing Assistants Susan and Edward.

When I arrived June was sitting in her Geri chair in her room and was receiving oxygen. As usual June sat with her eyes closed and was non responsive when I talked with her and took her hand and kissed her. I sat with June in her room until Brunch time. I just held June's hand while we listened to music on her small CD player. I would occasionally assure June that I loved her and would always take care of her.

June's breathing concerned me. She would breathe rather deeply and rapidly for 8-10 cycles and then would breath slower and quieter for 8-10 cycles...then start the same breathing all over again. This she did for most of the day except during nap time when her breathing seemed more normal.

June had been given a Morphine drug called Roxanol (5mgs) just before nap time and it seemed to have an effect. The drug was to be administered every 4 hours. The effect seemed to wear off quickly. I talked with Nurse Dianne about this as well as Bev the Nurse Practitioner who came in later in the day. The decision was made to increase the dosage and frequency and watch June for the resulting effects.

June will be given an EKG and if the results are normal, she will be given digitalis to slow her heart rate down. Her heart rate or pulse is very high at about 118 to 125.

Our son David came in late morning and stayed with us for a couple of hours. Julie our daughter was given some time off of her work so that she could spent time with June, David and I...little did I know at the time, but in only four (4) years, also in the month of October on the 18th, our son David would be called home by God...a victim of lung cancer from smoking!

Wednesday Afternoon October 22nd

June ate nothing and drank nothing at the noon Brunch. Pam (a lady from Therapy who seems to have a special way with June) did her best to feed June a container of "Magic" (fortified nutrition) but June refused to accept it. Pam usually suceeds when no one else does. Pam has even come in on her days off (without pay) just in order to feed June. Pam tells of how June resembles her own mother in appearance.

I thought I had nothing to lose by trying to give June some frozen Sherbet at the normal snack time. (1:30 PM) Much to my surprise, I was able to feed June a small container of Sherbet. Of course as normal, I would have to slide the frozen sherbet off of the spoon with the edge of my finger and between her lips and into her mouth. She would not accept any water. Sherbet does however have considerable water content. The cold and sweet Lemon flavored Sherbet apparently felt good in her mouth and it promoted June to chew and swallow it.

I tried to get a reading on June’s longevity from Nurse Carolyn, Nurse Dianne and Bev the NP. No one of course wanted to make any commitments. Carolyn seemed the most pessimistic. Dianne did not want to say much about June's chances. Bev said that in the past, whenever June had Aspiration Pneumonia she always bounced back and in three days would be back to normal and back to eating well. This time she said it is different. June was not bouncing back. The difference was readily apparent to me also. We had gone 6 days with no real improvement other than temporary periods of taking some food and drink.

After June's normal afternoon nap time, the staff got June up (into her Geri chair) for supper to see if June would eat or drink anything. June did not accept any of her normal food. She did however accept the contents of a container of frozen "Magic". Edward who is one of the more successful NA's with feeding June was persistent until he was able to get June to accept a small glass of apple juice and a small glass of water. He said she took one spoon of applesauce. I thanked Edward for his fine efforts. Edward had fed June her very first supper when June initially arrived at the Benedictine over two and one half years ago. I recall being concerned at the time as June had never previously experienced a male NA. I need not have been concerned as June smiled and chuckled an obvious acceptance when she was first introduced to Edward. Every meal time involves periods of coughing and choking with both food and fluids. Coughing causes June to be fearful. Even during nap times she may have to cough up phlegm and this is preceded by a short crying sound as she feels the cough coming on. Because of the Alzheimer's she appears to not understand what is happening and becomes afraid.

June’s breathing again sounded uncomfortable this evening. Her rate of respiration was about 28 whereas the desirable is 16-20.

Jerry Anderson (friend) stopped by earlier and visited with June, Julie and I. Jerry was kind enough to volunteer to sit with June at night if ever needed.

Wednesday Evening October 22nd

I tried to find out from Bev the NP, what the risk was if I were to go to the house to do this report, eat supper and to sleep for the night. She rightly said, she could make no guarantees but that she thought June would be okay for the night. I left my phone number with Nurse Dianne with the plan to call as soon as I can got this report out. (Call made later at around 9:30 PM and no change reported.) Dianne is a nurse who routinely spends an extra 20-30 minutes with June every night before going off duty. She does this in order to be sure that June has a last glass of water or other fluid. Dianne the evening nurse knows how concerned I am about June's fluid intake and the possibility of her becoming thirsty at night.

It was a very lonesome ride back to the house. June lost her ability to walk in early 2006. Shortly thereafter, June no longer appeared to know me. Although June has not known me for over two years, nor talked to me for the same time, I have become accustomed to June being an intimate part of my daily life. I have my daily routine of sitting with June during the day, holding her hand, (See photo below) kissing her occasionally, and going to the little chapel with June for prayers and quiet times. I always marveled at the warmth and the softness of June's hands as I held them. Often I would feel June tighten her grip on my hand. I would think and talk about the things we used to do together. I would tell June numerous times how much I loved her and that I would always love her and care for her. Now that this all seems about to go away, it is difficult to cope with it..

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Note: Alzheimer’s is not a disease that permits one to communicate and pass on messages of love and caring in the late stages. Alzheimer’s is a disease of apparent mental isolation with no two way communications and little or no responses of any kind. For most of the last two years June was largely non responsive and sat with her eyes closed for most of the day. Although I would hold June’s hand and continually assured her of my love, I do not know if she heard any of the things that I said to her…I hope that holding her hand was some reassurance. Our youngest daughter Julie once told me that at times she wished her Mom June had Cancer instead of Alzheimer’s because then at least she would be able to communicate with her and tell her how much she loved and admired her. Alzheimer's also takes away the ability of the victim to make or leave a last message or words for the loved ones left behind.

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Thursday Morning, October 23rd, 2008 - June's Passing

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 Jesus at Heaven's gates

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The next morning (Thursday) at a little after 7 AM, I received a call from the morning Nurse Kim. I was in the process of showering and shaving preparatory to going to the nursing home for the day when the call came in.

Once I heard who was calling, I knew immediately what the message would be. June had passed away at about 7 AM. June and our life together had ended. I hung up the phone. For a few minutes I stood not knowing what to do. This was not how it was supposed to be...I was supposed to be there. I do not know why I was not called earlier. I apprently did not make it clear to all involved that I wanted to be with June in her final hour. I had not talked with Kim who was to be the morning nurse the following morning. 

I remember saying aloud, "God tell me what to do!" Finally I was able to gather my wits about me suficient to make a few quick phone calls to some of the children with a request to call the others. I then immediately drove directly to the nursing home just a mile or four minutes away.

After arriving, I hugged June and kissed her. I then simply sat with June amid tears, holding her arm and hand until the Miller Funeral Home's "men in black" came to take June away. I asked June to forgive me for not being with her when she left this world. I wanted so much to be with June in the last hour when her life ended here on earth. I had made a grave error in judgment. A failure that will linger in the back of my mind forever. I could not help thinking of the saying - "Should have, Could have, Would have, it is too late now." The saying now applied to me.**

**My good friend and poet from Nacogdoches, Texas, Marsha McKneely Ault, took my above comments of remorse, guilt and regret for not being at June's side when she died and wrote a beautiful poem "Should Have, Could Have, Would Have" in June's behalf ...a poem telling me it was okay that I was not there and to let it go...Readers are invited to scroll down to the "Reader's Comments and see Marsha's beautiful poem.

As June's children and grandchildren arrived, the sounds of their sadness filled the room.

I remember being concerned about June's appearance. I wanted June to look as favorable as possible to her children and grandchildren. After June passed away her mouth was left partially open. This condition which was certainly not normal, greatly concerned me. I wanted June to look like the mother and grandmother that the children and granchildren knew, loved and remembered. I tried to unobtrusively use one hand to push on June's chin to close her mouth. This effect was temporary and only lasted as long as the pressure of my hand remained. Later when the director of nursing, Kris appeared at June's side, I quietly mentioned my concern to her. Kris's attempts were also futile. I may have over reacted and thus placed more importance on this appearance concern than it should have received. I decided to abandon any further corrective attempts. June otherwise appeared peaceful, serene and displayed much of her normal beauty.

The Benedictine staff held a caring and sensitive bedside service (Led by Diane ) before June was taken away. The silent men in black were already waiting patiently in the background. In addition to the on duty staff, the service also included our children and grandchildren that were able to come to the nursing home on short notice. (Julie with her friend Geno, Steven, Gretchen, David, Daniel, Erik and Emily.

Pastor David Glesne, our Redeemer Lutheran Senior Pastor arrived just after June had been taken away.

Meicy NAI was told that Meicy was with June in her final moments. Meicy, a kindly caring NA who looks like the mother that she is, had just come on duty. Meicy is a patient little lady with a big heart. It is comforting to know that Meicy was with June as she departed on her final journey. I have often thought that Meicy could have been a Norman Rockwell drawing on the cover of the old "Saturday Evening Post." -

(Meicy's Photo is on the right)

June's long weary journey into the darkness of Alzheimer's has resulted in my parallel journey of almost 12 years with a gradually increased grieving as I watched June slowly slip away. Suddenly the one long journey of grief ended and a new journey of unknown dimensions and length has begun....I miss June so very much...

This last chapter in June's life is dedicated to Pam, Meicy, Edward, and Nurse Dianne, who are all committed, patient and caring persons - my dream team for June's care were all in place during the last hours of June's life - however it was not to be.

I did not realize it, the bell had already tolled for June and God had already prepared a place for her, a place where Alzheimer's does not exist.

"in my father's house are many mansions....

I go to prepare a place for you..."

John 14:2 (KJV)

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June and Stans hands

(June and Stan's hands - Photo by Jim Gehrz October 2007)

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Postscript - A Note from Mona

On the day of June’s passing, I received a touching note from Mona Glesne.Mona is the wife of Dave Glesne, the Redeemer Lutheran Church’s Senior Pastor.

Mona GlesneMona appears to have possessed a special intuition, sense or perception of June’s imminent passing during the early morning hours of the evening before.

This is Mona’s note as received on 23 October 2008:

“Dear Stan,

Last night after baking most of the afternoon and late into the evening, I couldn't sleep so I was praying. I prayed especially for you and June. It was about 1:30 am and I ended up in tears as I felt your upcoming loss and June's gain in heaven.

I have been sensitive this month because we are approaching the one year anniversary of Dave's mom's death.

I prayed that God would take her soon and that he would already be filling you with His peace and comfort as you begin your life with June in heaven and you still here.

I wasn't surprised to hear of her passing from Dave late this morning. I will continue to pray for you as you walk these lonely days. May you be comforted by the wonderful memories you have of June.

Sincerely,

Mona”

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Who was/is June Berg the person?

June was a mother, grandmother, and a wife and a world traveler who traveled extensively in the US, Canada and visited Europe many times on forensic science matters as my administrative assistant…Edinburgh, Oxford, Rome, Zurich, Moscow, Leningrad, Budapest, Vienna, Dusseldorf...London became her favorite city…June also visited the birth place of her mother in Norway...June 1994

June was however, far more that these limited descriptions would suggest. June was a lady focused on doing God’s work…June loved her Redeemer Lutheran Church. June served on the Redeemer Lutheran Church Board. June taught Sunday school and was a Girl Scout Leader. June visited the Lynwood Nursing Home each Wednesday evening and had dinner with the residents. June was a part of the Redeemer’s afternoon ministry to the Fridley Convalescent Nursing home. June took her turn assisting with serving noon meals at the Marie Sandvik Mission in downtown Minneapolis. June delivered “Meals on Wheels”. June was frequently a Chair-woman for the church's “Ruth” andRebecca” circles and often hosted meetings in her home. June served on the Service and the Nominating Committee's of the (LCW) Lutheran Church Women's group. .June also assisted in the church kitchen, was a Sunday “Greeter” and a member of the Bell Choir. For six years (1992-1998) June participated in the International BSF (Bible Study Fellowship) that met weekly for Bible study at the church. (June later discontinued BSF when Alzheimer's became a part of her life.) June was paired in one of Redeemer's evangelistic teams that called on church members and others…Part of the church “Evangelistic Explosion” program. Dean, her team member described June:

“I remember for June, presenting the gospel was a very natural thing for her to do. People felt comfortable and not threatened by her because she was so genuine and related effectively with them. Her love for the Lord shone through her as she conversed with the people...she had a special spirit about her and always smiling.”

In spite of her many personal church activities, June gave little import to the work that she was doing. June always made light of and ignored her own achievements.

June was totally without guile or pretense. I know of very few persons in my lifetime that has or comes as close to the church description of the virtue of humbleness...often described as the "greatest of all virtues and the least sought after!"…June taught our children not to envy those who had more material possessions...Julie our daughter recalls June admonishing them to always "Be happy with what you have!" Julie also observed that June always placed family, friends and other's before herself.

June’s personality never strayed far from that of the farm girl from Colfax, Wisconsin that I first met in 1951.

June gave me a life time of unconditional love during our 56 year’s marriage and a life with only the regret that it is now over and that June has had to suffer the horrors of Alzheimer's. I owe her and God an unending debt! Her passing was as if a most beautiful symphony that played during our life together, had now ceased to exist! Before her Alzheimer's diagnosis our world and her character and personality were represented by a vast sea of bright and beautiful lights. After her Alzheimer's diagnosis, these bright lights all begin to slowly dim. As June slowly slipped deeper into the shadows of Alzheimer's, the lights gradually flickered out one by one. Eventually the time came during the last two years of her life, when the brightness that marked our world and June’s life was replaced by one of darkness.June rarely ever opened her eyes to a world that was then alien and strange to her. June had become so tired, exhausted and weary that in the last year of her life she lay like a wounded soldier on a battlefield. God mercifully took June home on the 23rd of October 2008. June's passing leaves me with an emptiness that can never be filled! When June first came into my life it was as if God had just awarded me a grand prize in a lottery of life...I will love her until the sands of time stop their endless trickle...there will never be another!

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For the story of June’s favorite home at 6025 Gardena Lane and the poem I wrote about this home during a day of deep sadness, click on the below link: (This was June’s home for almost 40 years. It was constructed shortly after the previous home was severely damaged in a tornado. 6025 Gardena Lane was the first home the June participated in the selection and purchase of a lot on a small hill, helped with the design of the home and watched it being constructed. 6025 Gardena Lane had a special place in her heart.)

“6025 Gardena Lane – June’s Favorite Home”

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Reader's Comments

Lorraine Mottershead - Manchester, United Kingdom - (7 October 2013): "Aw God Bless...Heartbreaking."

Kim Monery - (7 October 2013): "Very touching...(23 October 2013):" Thiinking of you on what is a difficult day for you."

Teresa Mayo - Maryville, Tennessee - (7 October 2013):"I could have used a few more tissues to get through that but once again wonderfully written. I pray that God gives you the strength to make it through the rest of this month."

Amy Stiel Almas - Waterford, Michigan - (7 October 2013): "So beautiful, Stan. Just don't be so hard on yourself because you weren't there when June passed...there is no way on earth you could be there 2/7. As I've seen so many times, Alzheimer's patients do just as June did- bounce back and forth. Big hugs."

Paula Rice Biever - Lauderdale, Minnesota - (7 October 2013): "Thank you for posting this Stan. I have June's page bookmarked for reference when questions come up from members of the support group I facilitate (for Lewy Body Dementia Caregivers). Your tips on feeding and visiting are very much appreciated."

Bonnie Seip - Ottsville, Pennsylvania - (7 October 2013): "So sorry Mr Berg ... I do know from my Nursing experience of 30 yrs of any time a Hospice resident EVER PASSED in front of the Family . I know this sounds very sad but it always happened for me anyway . You should not feel bad ... June knew you were there in her heart . Also as soon as someone passed I was taught by my Nursing Instructor to always open a window up so the spirit could be set free... I am thinking about you and Pray for you that you always find comfort in your upcoming days for the women you loved so dearly will always be so very close to your heart... May God Bless you ...(22 October 2013): "I am and will be thinking of you Mr. Berg .... Again I find myself in tears .... What a Wonderful Women Your June was ...Many Thoughts and Many Prayers to you and yours .... God Bless You ..."

Dona Gondwe - London, United Kingdom - (7 October 2013): "Very moving, and I LOVE the 'hands' picture!"

Vicki Cadogan - Limerick, Ireland - (7 October 2013): "Very touching Stan."

Richard Criscione - Cliffside Park, New Jersey - (7 October 2013): "Lord have mercy, and give you strength, Stan, during these sorrowful days of October. August is my month that evokes sorrow, as my Dad's Birthday is the 16th, He died on the 24th, and my Mom buried him on her Birthday, the 28th."

Sandy Williams Spencer - Phoenix, Arizona - (7 October 2013): "I didn't realize we both lost our loved ones so near the same time. My Mom passed in June, 2008. A few month before June. I'll be thinking about you this month."

Marsha McKneely Ault - Nacogdoches, Texas - (7 October 2013): "This love story will continue on the golden streets of Heaven."

Nancy Stinson - Indiana - (7 October 2013): "You could read the love in this reading. Stanton both professionally and personally I have been a caretaker .. Maybe June ... her love for you was she didn't want you to watch helplessly like you had been doing. It sounds like the staff truly cared and she was loved. We always want the answer and someday we will understand it all completely because it is in His time his way... in her own way she and our Lord were speaking ...Some where in that shell she knew...Time does not always heal but knowing where oure loved ones are is comforting... God Bless you."

Christine Pickard - United Kingdom - (8 October 2013): "This has been a Learning experience by reading this, Thanks for sharing Stanton , never blame yourself ,we can't be everywhere at once, you did your very best. Have a lovely day today..."

Anne Moghraby - Solihull, United Kingdom - (8 October 2012): "Very moving."

Maura BuddyBear - Dublin, Ireland - (8 October 2013): "Stanton you write June's journey with Alzheimher's so well , be kind to yourself you were with June every step of the way . I cried & felt your sorrow at not being there for June's final moments. People say this was meant to be . Take great comfort in knowing June is with you always in spirit and knows all you did for her...(23 October 2013): " Stanton thinking & praying for you & June today."

Gill Denman - Essex, United Kingdom - (8 October 2013):"Do you think the difference in June's breathing was actually saying goodbye while you were there? What happened during the night was just the completion of shut down after the goodbyes had been made. A seriously ill rellative was taken to hospital some years ago, her son spent time with her, he drove home and, as he opened his door the phone was ringing, she had passed just after he left. I had seen her a couple of days before and had a clear impression that she said her goodbye to me at that time. Your diary of events is a valuable reference to those who still have to face that situation...Stan: It is so strange why things in dementia seem individual specific. Mum has had it for so long, at least 10 years, probably 15 or more when I reflect back, yet she is still mobile and can communicate. She has behavioural problems, forgets where things are and then, as though a switch is closed, she rememebrs again. it is distressing for her but also for us, she is very much like a spoiled hyperactive child, sleep patterns are all over the place (note the time I'm writing this - 1.45 am!). If my dad had been on his own dealing with this, it would have finished him, I find it stressfull and exhausting. I do dread the slow goodbye if it happens with mum. As I write this I do wonder if your experiences happened for a reason, your background and analytical mind made you the right person to observe and compile June's web site, it has contributed greatly to personal knowledge base and dementia awareness."

Chris Law - Westland, Michigan - (8 October 2013): "My condolences to you and your family Stanton. My mother passed away 4 years ago from colon cancer. She had cancer about 5 years before and we thought it was over but it came back, very aggresive this time and finally took her. She was the closest to an angel on earth to me and to my close family. My dad lost his younger brother to drugs, then his father a year later from a stroke and then his other younger brother which was also drug related a year after that. Now he is 73 and has had dementia (since about spring of 2012). I hope and pray for a cure/effective treatment for him as well as others. I never knew or even thought of what Alzheimer`s and or dementia was. Now I have learned quite a bit about it. As they say you never really realize what something is until it happens to you or the person/people you love. Like my mom I feel so blessed to be able to help him (my dad) and care for him like I had done for my mother. I`ll be 34 next month and I have a disease of the spine. It can be so hard sometimes but I continue to push on. I remain optimistic. I`m still pretty young and I hope and pray to God I will be around to see the day when hopefully all of these fatal diseases can be easily treatable/manageable and even better... eradicated!! I admire your love, dedication and devotion you have towards your wife and family and also all of your work towards Alzheimer`s. It is very impressive. You should be very proud for everything you have done. They don`t seem to make them like you anymore Stanton. Thank you sir for being such a wonderful credit to the human race!"

Stacey Carpenter Cotton - Arlington, Tennessee - (8 October 2013): "Thank you for sharing June with all of us. The awareness you bring is such an honor to her...(23 October 2013): " Thinking of you today, Mr. Berg."

Dianne Creel - Concord, North Carolina - (10 October 2013): "Stan, I too traveled such a journey with my precious and loving mother as you did with June. I too, feel daily that I let her down but I genuinely know that you and I did all we could possibly do for our loved ones. You, perhaps more then me. I often wonder when all my, "if's and if only's" will ever stop spinning daily in my head? However, I do find comfort even during my personal heartbreak that God chose me to travel personal this journey with my Mother and I honestly fill like He is saying, "well done, my faithful and obedient child." Blowing~~blessings & love always your way."

Tracey Bressler Muldowney - Pottsville, Pennsylvania - (22 October 2013):"My heart & prayers to you Mr Berg on tomorrow's sad anniversary:...There are no more tears for June or my dad, they are healed by the side of Jesus. I always tell mom-" I can't even imagine the pain/loss of losing your soulmate/best friend & spouse" I will continue to pray for you- you're such a gift to me with your blogs & essays. They help me so much."

Cathy Clements - Paradise, California - (22 October 2013): "It's a brighter day for her."

Bridie Breen - Manchester, United Kingdom - (22 October 2013):"Thinking of you Stan, remember the love ."

Melanie Petersen - Big Lake, Minnesota - (22 October 2013):"We will be thinking of you tomorrow. Love and hugs being sent your way!"

Rosemary Mather - Carrickfergus, Northern Ireland - (22 October 2013):"U are in my thoughts and prayers Stanton, sending love and hugs. God bless u my friend ."

Alexandra Zimmerman - Pine Island, New York - (22 October 2013): "My prayers will be with you tomorrow Stan! {hugs} and love from NY."

Jennifer Dabney - Pomona, California - (22 October 2013):"My thoughts are of you, wishing comfort for you as you relive these final hours on the anniversary of her death. Your caring, love, and concern you have are reflected on the faces of spouses whose loved ones no longer recognize them. Yet like you, they continue to visit everyday. God bless you and them."

Tonya Gunn O'Brien - Cleveland, Georgia - (22 October 2013): "A love like you and your wife had is so precious and God blessed you with a beautiful marriage."

Helaine Berman - Prescott, Arizona - (23 October 2013):"So sorry for your loss. I hope you always remember the good times."

Debbie Susan Kennedy - London, United Kingdom - (23 October 2013): "A beautiful story Stan, the way you explain Alzhemiers with the lights goibg out is just like that for my dear mum.it is a dreadfull illness having to watch someone you love go through it.my heart goes out to you Stan. just keep thinking of the lovely memories you have of your dear June."

Connie Lowers O'Brien - Birchwood, Tennessee - (23 October 2013): "Alzheimer's is by far the hardest and horrific disease I have ever encountered!"

Patricia D'Esposito Zglinski - New Jersey - (23 October 2013):"Stan, She is without pain for 5 years now. Celebrate, she can hear you."

Pamela Porter Dilluciano- (23 October 2013):"So precious that you keep all your memories alive...that's LOVE."

Catherine Jones-Hatcher - Richmond, Virginia - (23 October 2013):"I know this is a hard day for you, Stan.... June would be so proud of all the people you have touched in her honor. You have shared the gift of music and the gift of knowledge. You have educated us all , in her name! ... and she LIVES through you! Yes, she lives... I feel as if I know her personally... and long after you have joined her...her page will live on and continue to educate those that need it.You, my friend, have accomplished all this in her name. Kudos to you!"

Cathye Cook Bordwell  -  Spokane Valley, Washington – (28 October 2013): “So beautiful, thank you for sharing your love of her, it reminds me of My Mom & Dad ~ Tears. My Mom's journey ended June 2012.”

Lyn Young - Elgin, United Kingdom - (22 October 2014) :Will light candle with great pride in Memory of June, Stanton. You look after yourself! Positive vibes! My thoughts are with you and your family!"

Elise Goldstein Widerker  - Brooklyn, New York - (22 October 2014):"RIp to your dear June and hope your sweet memories give you comfort on the anniversary of her passing and always."

Sue Strayer Orcutt - Maple Grove, Minnesota - (22 October 2014): "Thinking of you Stan. Hard day for me as I lost my 52 year old brother in California on the 3rd and now my dad who is 94 is slipping away there also. God bless you."

Sheri Alpert  - Englewood, Ohio - (22 October 2014): "Very touching story. I understand the pain of not being there when she passed. My mom was over an hour away from where I live. Hated knowing she was alone when she passed. You are an inspiration to me and many others."

Victoria LeAnn  - Little Elm, Texas - (22 October 2014): "This literally took my breath away! Rest in Peace Dear Ms June! All my love Stan. I will light a candle for your dear sweet wife tonight. If everyone could have the Love you and June had and have for one another, this world would be a much better place! I pray i find Love like yours! God Bless you!!"

Pat Garland  - Sun City Center, Florida  - (22 October 2014): "My Friend, I now know the depth of your pain and my loss is only slightly over one month!!"

Patti Hanson  - Sioux Falls, South Dakota - (22 October 2014): "I'm now working in the activities department of a local multifaceted elder care facility. I'm assigned to the nursing home, assisted living and memory care section(s). I absolutely LOVE my job!! I painted the nails of two gals in the memory care unit yesterday- while doing so, a thought of your June swept thru my mind- I wondered if she enjoyed nail time and what color she favorited. I see in one of your posted pictures, that she liked the darker reds. May she RIP Stanton!"

John Stevens - Twin Falls, Idaho - (22 October 2014): "I believe it is Gods plan whether we are present or not at passing. He knows what we can take. The joyous thing is June will be waiting for you to step through the door one of these days. She will say "welcome home. I want you to meet Jesus." Your love will continue, all pain will be erased. No more sorrow. It will be a glorious day indeed. Bless you Stan. May God give you Peace until that day."

Marsha M. Ault

Marsha McKneely Ault  - Nacogdoches, Texas - (22 October 2014): " I wrote the below poem for a special friend of mine...Stan...I just wanted you to know that June loves you and waits for the day you two will be reunited in each other's arms..." ... Stan's note: My good friend Marsha wrote this beautiful poem by taking my comment of remorse, regret and guilt... as I wrote it in my journal above...after I missed being with June in her final hour...what a kind and thoughtful poetic commentary by Marsha in the form of response from June!

                              "Should Have, Could Have, Would Have"

                              My dear, dear Love

                                  it pains me so 

way up above

to know you mourn

because I left.

When you tear, I’m torn.

I chose to leave

with you at home.

I could not bear to grieve

to say one more goodbye.

My heart would have burst.

Instead—like a butterfly 

I was set free.

“Should have, could have,

would have”— let it go. 

I will be so glad

when we can say, “Hello!”

All wrapped in your arms

never let me go again.

You’ll protect me from harm

my dear, dear Stan

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Debbie Susan Kennedy  - London, United Kingdom - (22 October 2014): "Thinking of you tomorrow Stan & sending hugs your way, they haven't got far to travel coz I'm in the USA at the moment.  I hope all your beautiful Memories of your dear wife June get you through tomorrow."

Cindy Jones - Lake Jackson, Texas - (22 October 2014): "I can't wait for my mom to go. I know that June will be there to welcome her in. Thanks so much Stanton for always posting. I know that it is unbearable for you but you were left to help us all get through it. Thank you."

Rob Zelenak - Fridley, Minnesota - (22 October 2014): "Thoughts will be with you Stan. June's story is an inspiration!"

Nancy Rudquist - Arden Hills, Minnesota - (23 October 2014):"I will pray for you. I know the power of dates that have changed life forever. I think of Heaven and wonder how many members from Redeemer get together and enjoy their friendship as they share in the eternal power of joy and love. May your heart be blessed knowing that June is rejoicing and wanting you to rejoice with her, even when you are still apart. God bless you Stan as you remember all the good times and thank God for what will be all of your tomorrows."

Teri Hill Bell Aguiar - Gainsville, Florida - (23 October 2014): "Stan, I have never been loved. So to read your True Love and devotion to June is evidence that it dose exist. I thank you for sharing that knowledge and understanding."

Jennifer Dabney  - Pomona, California - (23 October 2014): "I read through June's last hours and all the responses you received. As you relive the memories, please know you are l... and supported by the ones whose lives you touch."

Nancy Senechal - East Lansing, Michigan - (23 October 2014): "God bless you ...you always have been and always will be by her side....hugs.!! A true beautiful love affair.....the same that both my parents had..."

Allison Sauvlet - Toms River, New Jersey - (23 October 2914): "God bless you Stan you have great memories of June...remember all the good times as I do for my dad. I have so many."

Linda Lee  - Garstang, United Kingdom - (23 October 2014): "I have read many of Junes pages Stan all beautifully written, I believe June is still with you and hope you have a day of only happy memories of the many years you spent together." 

Susanna Nicholos  - Catskill, New York - (24 Octber 2014): "Keeps bringing back memories of my mom, I think its still too Fresh but I do love your posts and pages. Good to have a friend who knows what you have been through, I too. Know I will see mom in heaven one day."

Athena Chakris Hoque  - Los Angeles, California - (30 October 2014): "I've been reading June's page...it absolutely breaks my heart for you and your family...and oh, how it angers me when I read about the incredible lack of funding and the lack of effort where it matters...I can't tell you how much I appreciate what you do for those lost in the world of dementia...thank you!!!"

Carla Miller Noziglia  - Aiken, South Carolina - (30 October 2014): "Prayers for you, Stanton; my Keith died 5 years ago and I still grieve."

 

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June's Funeral

June 1994

June's funeral notice as published in the Minneapolis Star in October 2008 can be seen on this website in the drop down menu under the "In Memoriam" label - or just Click on:

"June K. (Rolstad) Berg - In Memoriam"